Me today versus me tomorrow. What is it that separates our present selves from our future selves? Is that a person that I even want to meet? Would it be better to not even think about it and let tomorrow be tomorrow me’s problem? What do I want out of life? Is it too late to be the person I always envisioned my self becoming? What if I fail?
*If you see the typo remember, all your base are belong to us 😤
Questions arise from uncertainty. The feeling of uncertainty comes from a (perceived) lack of control. Believing you lack control comes from negative thoughts and experiences. These thoughts and experiences shape who we are as a person. Who we are today is the byproduct of the decisions that have been made in the past, whether by ourselves or others on our behalf.
What if the past wasn’t actually the best indicator of future performance (or trajectory). And if it is, what if I filtered out the noise from that dataset (i.e. past decisions) and focused on the ones that align closer to my desired reality? There’s nothing wrong with being a little bias 🤭.
At some point over the past six years, I’ve found myself repeating the same mantra.
There’s no benefit to shortchanging yourself.
This mantra encapsulates the new mindset that I’ve been fostering over that timeframe. When did it become the default option to doubt ourselves? To belittle our own abilities? To downplay our commitment to our goals just because our path (or pace) doesn’t mirror the mainstream image? After a while it gets tiring always doubting yourself. Always fantasizing about what could be. What if I was a different person, a better and cooler version of myself (whom we’ll refer to as B.C).
How different is B.C. from you? What is the one thing that separates you today from B.C? I’m going to cheat and point out the two main things (this is my platform, I can bend the rules 😎).
Time and Action.
B.C. at some moment in time made the decision to act, and act, and act, and keep acting until it turned into action (bars 🧨).
Starting Now
The past has happened, the present is still happening, and the future hasn’t been decided yet.
-Abu Trayor
Every moment has a starting point. Every moment is the result of previous moments. These previous moments are what we call decisions. These decisions were the starting point of the current moment. Time is a flat circle.
We can choose our starting point. We can choose the moment in which we decide not only to pursue our goals (fitness, new job, start a business, etc.) but to do so sustainably so that we maximize our chances of long-term success.
If this isn’t your first time pursuing a goal you have then it’s likely you’ll have some lingering doubts and even fear of “failing” again. However, life is often described as a test with answers provided at a later date (or not at all). What if your previous attempts were akin to practice exams? What if you focused on the the two “selfs”? The things you learned about yourself and the pursuit itself. Then it becomes a matter of repetition and knowing that you are only gaining more experience and increasing your chances of success with time.
A new approach I’ve developed with achieving goals (not dreams) is understanding two key factors:
- It will take a while (ranging from months to years)
- Typically, I give myself a timeline of 6 months to two years with milestones along the way.
- It will take multiple attempts (or “failures” as most people think of it)
- It is an iterative process, making adjustments is part of the game plan (Doc Rivers is vehemently shaking his head in disagreement 😠)
The power of the starting point is that it gives you more power and control than you were cognizant of. It always you to set the rules and create your own interpretation of reality. Each “failure” is re-labeled as an attempt and success of measured by the progress bar, not by whether or not your crossed the finish line. With each attempt you are getting better and going further. Crossing the finish line becomes only a matter of time.
This mindset is a key differentiator between who we are today and B.C. By reframing what “failure” looks like, we are able to have a more positive and methodical approach towards achieving our goals and growing as a person. These negative emotions and outlook that feel engraved within us are part of characteristics that I call the mindsent.
Mindset vs Mindsent
The mind is a tool. It is a malleable tool. It is a powerful tool. Similar to an RPG it is a tool with unlimited growth potential. Your mindset dictates it’s power. Your approach (or process) determines it’s direction.
Your mindset dictates it’s power. Your approach (or process) determines it’s direction.
– Abu Trayor
The mindset component is pretty self-explanatory. I don’t need to rehash a bunch of platitudes and motivational quotes to get you to understand the importance of a positive mindset. At a future point, we will delve deeper into the sustainable mindset. For now, I want to address what you might have thought was a typo – mindsent. The mindsent is different from the mindset (color coded to reduce confusion).
The mindset in this context is forward looking and external in nature. It determines not just your future actions but how you are likely to approach certain situations.
For example, if you had a habit of overthinking and overanalyzing all areas of your life. How would you react to a situation where you were doing some grocery shopping and the cashier was cold. It’s likely you’d replay the interaction multiple times to pin point where you went wrong. Did you fail to greet them with a smile? Did you fail to maintain proper eye contact without making things awkward? Did you fail to engage or maintain any small talk? It sounds exhausting but this is how many of us (myself included) tend to interact and interpret the world. The “right” mindset can be the difference between going about your day and being stuck in time (who said time travel doesn’t exist). Ultimately, the mindset is forward looking but how it is constructed (i.e. overthinking) can lead to being being frozen in time (let’s call this the Mr. Freeze mindset).
Mindsent in contrast is internal and stems from the subconscious. The mindsent is comprised of your unfiltered thoughts and is more present focused. The mindsent is all the “what ifs” that plague you anytime you find yourself at a crossroads. It is a survival and self-preservation mechanism.
The keys lies in finding the right balance between these two states of the mind. The aforementioned cashier example would be a mindsent (or Mr. Freeze 🧊) dominant mind state. This is the same state of mind that led to the questions asked at the very beginning of this article.
You are at a new starting point (or crossroads) in which you’ve decided (congrats by the way) to pursue your goal. Your mindset is optimistic about creating a new reality for yourself, while your mindsent is delineating all the ways in which things can go wrong or have already gone wrong in the past.
Your mindset on one hand is telling you that this is a new attempt and you are only going to make more progress this time around (i.e. the progress bar). Your mindsent is telling you that you’ve already failed before (or if this is your first time, that you’ll come up short) and you won’t cross the finish line. One state of mind is focused on the journey while the other is focused solely on the destination.
Let’s revisit the same questions from earlier in this article and address them head on from our new starting point.
What is it that separates our present selves from our future selves?
What separates us from B.C. is time and action. There’s no need to put unnecessary pressure on yourself by choosing a contracted timeline. If your goal is to improve your fitness then giving yourself a minimum of six months would more make sense than 30 days. In addition, having a sustainable approach that encourages consistency over intensity (this can be built over time but will burn you out if you go from 0 to 100 on day one) allows you to focus on your progress bar rather then the finish line.
Is that a person that I even want to meet?
If you give yourself a reasonable time frame and establish consistency. Not only are you making regular progress towards your goal but your mindset is also growing as well. You will become more confident and optimistic. If you were happy with yourself today, a person that is showing up consistently and demonstrating self respect, why wouldn’t you want to meet the future version of yourself?
Would it be better to not even think about it and let tomorrow be tomorrow me’s problem?
Now we know this is the mindsent talking. This is a self-preservation mechanism. Not all thoughts deserve your attention.
What do I want out of life? Is it too late to be the person I always envisioned my self becoming?
That’s the power of the starting point. There really isn’t a limit to what your can accomplish (realistically). Remember your mind has unlimited growth potential. Your mindset dictates it’s power. Your approach (or process) determines it’s direction.
What if I fail?
Try again. You’re only getting better.
Closing Thoughts
All that to say, yesterday doesn’t have to define today or tomorrow.
Start today.
Try today.
Keep trying today.
Evaluate what you can improve upon today.
Profit 🤑
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